UPDATING OCCASIONALLY (FOR NOW)

9 thoughts on “558 – Cotton Clad Calamity”

  1. Raznaak

    Yup, he’s a bastard XD

  2. Dr. Norman (not a real doctor)

    Are those pajamas available in XXXL in the gift shop?

  3. Otaku

    It’s been a while, so let me ask: Did we get a reason for him to WANT Susie dead? Not to backseat, but if we didn’t, I’m worried were about to move into “Stupid Evil” territory. Now, stupid happens, don’t get me wrong. It’s not bad storytelling for that to be the case here.

    You’ve just done a good job NOT having that be a driving factor, so the “Kill off the stars of my successful reality TV show.” seems shortsighted, otherwise. Oh, I guess I could be mistaken about the in-story reality TV show’s success. Like, if the company behind them is losing money, or they think a change in management at the ranch would make the whole thing more popular/profitable, then I can see the above scenario happening as well.

    I REALLY think I’m just forgetting something important, but that I don’t have time to deep dive to remind me of, hence the comment. >_<

    1. Deoxy

      It certainly has been stretched out over quite a while, but there have definitely been hints from quite near the beginning that whoever is running the reality TV show definitely wants her dead.

      But I certainly don’t recall any reason why.

      1. Clint

        Yeah it’s fair to not remember since it’s been a hot minute (many, many minutes) but if you feel like a refresher the most relevant bits would be the beginning of Episode 8 and the end of Episode 15. We haven’t explicitly spelled out exactly what The Exec means by his “side hustle” or who was on the other end of that phone call, though.

        I’m hoping that when the whole thing is eventually available it will make sense, or at least enough sense to have hung this narrative on.

        1. Otaku

          Thanks for the replies, Deoxy and Clint. Yeah, I’d totally forgotten about those things. Good to know!

  4. Evervigilant

    Seems about time for the two people who aren’t there to make a surprise entrance as the ace Susie didn’t even know she had.

  5. Scarsdale

    There’s still 3-5 people on her side that might be planning something. This guy is a megalomaniac with a god complex, so letting him think he’s the sharpest tool in the shed sets him up for a fall. Everything depends on those cameras, and I suspect their little stop over by the charging coffins had something to do with her actual plan, not the one the a-hole thinks it is.

  6. lyra

    Really enjoyed the opening of Zombie Ranch. I like the combination of the western setting with the zombie concept, it gives the story a really distinctive atmosphere. I’m a freelance illustrator and animator, and I’d be interested in seeing how some of these scenes could translate into motion, especially as a short animated teaser or character scene.

    If you’re ever interested in something like that, you can reach me here:

    IG: eve_verse_
    Email: [contact.lilaclines@gmail.com](mailto:contact.lilaclines@gmail.com)
    Discord: Lyralilac_

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558 – Cotton Clad Calamity
Posted on August 26, 2026 by Dawn

What would you call this? Armchair assassination? Merk-from-home?

Well, Suzie ain't dead (or undead) quite yet, so we'll just have to see if his gloating is justifiable.

Who drew first blood?

Posted on September 11, 2013 by Clint

First_blood_posterSo this last week, I addressed an odd quirk in my movie experiences regarding the Rambo franchise. Namely, that while I have over the years watched Rambo: First Blood Part II, Rambo III, and even the more recent (just plain) Rambo, I never had viewed the original First Blood. I knew the gist of it: Sylvester Stallone’s Vietnam vet character freaks out after mistreatment by corrupt small town law enforcement and a big manhunt ensues… but since John Rambo turns out to be a green beret, who is hunting whom?

I don’t know quite what I was expecting. The sequels aren’t exactly thought provoking, although they’re certainly entertaining as long as you’re in it for the gunfire and the explosions. I wondered if First Blood would have anything different on the table, before all the formulaic violence was established and John Rambo became more of a jingoistic cartoon (and I do mean that literally).

So here’s the thing: the climax of First Blood does indulge itself in the sort of over-the-top, almost laughable action that came to define the franchise, as John Rambo wields an M60 from the hip to blow up cars and gas stations. Prior to that, though, it’s surprisingly low key. Rambo’s opponents aren’t trained soldiers, and the script respects that… even the National Guardsmen are “weekend warrior” types who have never really been shot at and react appropriately when it happens (ducking for cover and being very reluctant to move from it). The actual body count is incredibly low, and I’ve said before that when you keep it that way it makes each actual death mean more. First Blood could in fact be said to have only one “confirmed kill”, and it’s more of a tragic accident than anything, born out of desperation on one side and the darkness of human ego on the other.

Now there’s a police car later on which is inexplicably made of explodium and thus it’s difficult to imagine the cops inside surviving its crash, but that moment happens to be my dividing line between all that goes before and the aforementioned M60 rampage, the moment where the movie goes somewhere entirely different (and less interesting to me because I’ve seen it before).

But up until that division, there is this fascinating film of a situation spiraling out of control despite efforts on both sides to defuse it. Maybe in that sense the climax isn’t totally out of place, because as a small town goes up in flames you remind yourself every last bit of this happened because the Sheriff didn’t want a “drifter” stopping for a bite to eat in his city limits. On the other hand, calling the Sheriff corrupt might be simplifying the issue, because there’s also a moment where a different John Rambo swallows his pride and moves on after the Sheriff drops him off (closer, it must be said, to his intended destination). This John Rambo turns around and comes back.

Both decisions are made out of pride and perfectly justified from the points of view of the characters involved, but from these small beginnings, these nothings, comes catastrophe. Stallone often gets short shrift as an actor, but every time someone grabs at John Rambo you can see the reflex for him to defend himself barely held in check, even as his expression remains numb… the symptoms of PTSD in action back when that was barely recognized as a thing. Of course, eventually it becomes too much and the freakout begins, but even then once a man lies dead there’s a sad moment where he tries to turn himself in, horrified at what’s happened. But a stray(?) trigger pull ends any hope of things being resolved. The bullets whine around him, cutting his cheek as he flees. First blood is drawn, and that’s when Rambo really starts getting mean.

Brian Dennehy turns in a great performance as the Sheriff as well. He’s nominally the villain, but if you walk in his shoes, with what he knows, well, he’s probably thinking he’s the hero. He doesn’t seem like a bad guy, or a corrupt one. In fact, he and most of his deputies seem like decent enough sorts in their daily lives. But his all-too-human ego won’t let him rest once things start escalating. There are many people who just really end up hating him, but I suppose I didn’t really, I just felt sad for everyone. I mean, heck, I wrote Muriel as someone convinced she was the hero as well, and her actions were much less sympathetic.

So, yeah, that first arc of Zombie Ranch I wrote was sort of my own study of a catastrophe that could have been avoided (or at least minimized) but for circumstance and ego, even with an unseen hand nudging things along. That’s probably why I’m a sucker right now for fiction that does similar things.

Who drew first blood? When the dust settles and the sun rises on the wreckage, the most tragic truth is that destruction doesn’t care about human justifications. But time and time again, we find ourselves unable to just walk away.