UPDATING OCCASIONALLY (FOR NOW)

9 thoughts on “558 – Cotton Clad Calamity”

  1. Raznaak

    Yup, he’s a bastard XD

  2. Dr. Norman (not a real doctor)

    Are those pajamas available in XXXL in the gift shop?

  3. Otaku

    It’s been a while, so let me ask: Did we get a reason for him to WANT Susie dead? Not to backseat, but if we didn’t, I’m worried were about to move into “Stupid Evil” territory. Now, stupid happens, don’t get me wrong. It’s not bad storytelling for that to be the case here.

    You’ve just done a good job NOT having that be a driving factor, so the “Kill off the stars of my successful reality TV show.” seems shortsighted, otherwise. Oh, I guess I could be mistaken about the in-story reality TV show’s success. Like, if the company behind them is losing money, or they think a change in management at the ranch would make the whole thing more popular/profitable, then I can see the above scenario happening as well.

    I REALLY think I’m just forgetting something important, but that I don’t have time to deep dive to remind me of, hence the comment. >_<

    1. Deoxy

      It certainly has been stretched out over quite a while, but there have definitely been hints from quite near the beginning that whoever is running the reality TV show definitely wants her dead.

      But I certainly don’t recall any reason why.

      1. Clint

        Yeah it’s fair to not remember since it’s been a hot minute (many, many minutes) but if you feel like a refresher the most relevant bits would be the beginning of Episode 8 and the end of Episode 15. We haven’t explicitly spelled out exactly what The Exec means by his “side hustle” or who was on the other end of that phone call, though.

        I’m hoping that when the whole thing is eventually available it will make sense, or at least enough sense to have hung this narrative on.

        1. Otaku

          Thanks for the replies, Deoxy and Clint. Yeah, I’d totally forgotten about those things. Good to know!

  4. Evervigilant

    Seems about time for the two people who aren’t there to make a surprise entrance as the ace Susie didn’t even know she had.

  5. Scarsdale

    There’s still 3-5 people on her side that might be planning something. This guy is a megalomaniac with a god complex, so letting him think he’s the sharpest tool in the shed sets him up for a fall. Everything depends on those cameras, and I suspect their little stop over by the charging coffins had something to do with her actual plan, not the one the a-hole thinks it is.

  6. lyra

    Really enjoyed the opening of Zombie Ranch. I like the combination of the western setting with the zombie concept, it gives the story a really distinctive atmosphere. I’m a freelance illustrator and animator, and I’d be interested in seeing how some of these scenes could translate into motion, especially as a short animated teaser or character scene.

    If you’re ever interested in something like that, you can reach me here:

    IG: eve_verse_
    Email: [contact.lilaclines@gmail.com](mailto:contact.lilaclines@gmail.com)
    Discord: Lyralilac_

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558 – Cotton Clad Calamity
Posted on August 26, 2026 by Dawn

What would you call this? Armchair assassination? Merk-from-home?

Well, Suzie ain't dead (or undead) quite yet, so we'll just have to see if his gloating is justifiable.

They’re moving fast… relatively speaking…

Posted on April 28, 2021 by Clint

Astute long-term observers of this comic will have noted that while over a decade has passed for us here in the “real world,” the timeline presented in Zombie Ranch (special presentations aside) covers a span of at most only a few weeks. You could posit this is due to our relatively slow update schedule. But if we actually get into relativity, science provides an alternate explanation, which is that the Zombie Ranch world is in fact moving very, very fast compared to ours.

Hey, don’t talk to me, talk to Einstein. Which might be difficult on account of him being dead, but his special theory of relativity lives on and the time dilation component he predicted may in fact be true. There’s a lot of math involved here but the basic premise (in my layman’s understanding, anyhow) is that the passage of time can be subjective based on the velocity of a given object. Clocks literally tick slower, enough so that clocks speeding along on board satellites in Earth orbit have to be programmed to adjust ever so slightly for the difference.

A popular example is an astronaut traveling near the speed of light who returns from what to them was a ten year space voyage only to find that over thirty years have passed for their planetbound friends and family. Oh, gravity is also involved in this equation, not just speed. You get near a black hole and amongst other issues, time is going to get wonky.

Anyhow, scientifically speaking over a decade may have passed for us but the folks in our Weird New West are obviously moving, not much slower than we, but much faster.

And also, our story has a lot of gravity to it.

So there.